It gives me great pleasure to have this opportunity to bring you B’s first ever blog post. Many of you will know her as @Honeytothe on twitter. She also happens to be my birthday twin. I’m not sure if that has any bearing on how relatable I found this piece, but I suspect it has more to do with her writing skills and honesty. There is a risk of drawing attention to my comparatively chaotic writing style, but it’s absolutely worth it. Thank you B.
A Different Perspective, by B.
I’ve toyed with the idea of writing a blog so many times, I’ve started and stopped. I think the main thing that freaks me out is, when it comes to writing, I’m old school. I like a real notebook and a nice pen and then the words flow. On a keyboard? Not so much.
So why am I here? Being able to guest blog for one blog, I thought I could manage. An offer I couldn’t refuse, even though I asked. And it might get me in the mindset to write all the things down that I have in my head I feel I should share (whether you like it or not.)
I wanted to share something I actually wrote the day after my best friend’s wedding a few months ago.
I was feeling philosophical and hungover, so the words flowed irrespective of whether or not I was writing in my moleskin or typing on my phone. I’m not sure what I was going to do with content, apart from save it for an opportunity such as this.
So here goes…
Yesterday, I went to a wedding. My best friend’s, in fact. I offered to take one for the team since I was a single pringle and sit at the table with her grandma and her grandma’s friend. Despite requesting eligible single bachelors on tap, there were none.
Uncle Jim, who is almost 90, introduced himself and then proceeded to tell me about his wife, who had died 6 years earlier, so couldn’t be at the wedding. Now I had already had a few glasses of prosecco, but the next bit made the hairs on the back of my neck tingle and a tear well in my eye.
He said, “I know she’s up there waiting for me. And we’ll be reunited again. She’s my soulmate and we’ll be together for eternity. You have to believe. It’s what gets you through it my dear”
He was so adamant and steadfast and strong with what he was saying, you could just tell in that moment, it was what he truly believed.
It made me think, a lot. Would I ever have that? Is love eternal? Can you find that person that you’re just meant to be with?
I often think will it happen for me? Will I have that moment? The thing is, I’m not looking. Far from it. In fact I’ve probably spent the last two and a half years running like a mad woman in the opposite direction of that. Ah, the joys of divorce. If nothing else, it certainly changes your perspective.
I think love can be many things. But as brilliant as it can be, it can be scary as hell too. Letting down your guard and the barriers that you put in place, letting someone love you unconditionally, when you probably don’t know how to love yourself.
Maybe it’s time to stop running.
Maybe it’s time to let the barriers down that I probably don’t even know are there.
Maybe, just maybe, Uncle Jim’s wife is waiting to be reunited once more. Here’s hoping.
If you want to read more from B, she has her very own blog now at http://honeytothe30.wordpress.com/